Merry Christmas Silverhorners!!

Hey Gang, Seasons Greetings from all of us at The View From Silverhorn Mountain. This being Christmas and all, and me busy writing posts for my new blog, The Cottage Chronicles I thought it behooved me....behooved...I was behooved, to repost my traditional Christmas poem. Yes, it's a repost, but it's Christmas, tradition and all, what isn't a repost?

T'was the night before Christmas,
when all over Silverhorn Mountain,
Not a creature was stirring, it was so cold the water froze in the fountain.
Parkas and long johns were worn by all here
As we sat by the chimmney in the hopes heat would be there.
The fire had gone out, the embers gone dead
While visions of flames danced in my halucinating head,
While I had done all my shopping with tender care,
I forgot to get wood, and the woodshed was bare.
When out on in the front porch there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my footstool to see what was the matter.
Away to the front door I flew like a goose,
But I tripped and fell face first, my shoelaces were loose.
A big jolly guy in a nice working suit stood on the stoop,
He said,"I wonder if I could come in for a second, too many milk and cookies, I need to have poop!"
When, behind him in the driveway, to my surprise my heart soared,
A tandem firewood truck full to the top with at least 3 cord.
With a great long stride, followed by a shuffle,
He moved quickly past me, but a fart he couldn't muffle.
Away to the outhouse, I roared like a lion,
I wasn't going to have the lodge bathroom smell like something dying.
I got his attention, cause he wiggled and turned, so lively and quick,
I knew in an instant, this might be that guy...old what's his name, hmmm...Nick?
I thought for a moment, but he couldn't wait,
He shuffled upstairs with a lively old gait.
More rapid than eagles the odors they came,
And my new guest, he whistled, shouted, and called them by name;
"Now, DASHER! now, DANCER! now, PRANCER and VIXEN!
On, COMET! on CUPID! on, DONDER and BLITZEN!
I've seen a lot in my years, and heard much too
But this was the first time a fart smelled like burned stew.
As Christmas's go, I have seen very many,
But this was a Christmas unlike any,
When the big fellow let go a full fledged bellow
I swear the snow neath my feet turned a very bright yellow.
I had never been exposed to such a stench,
Except the one time the septic field oozed out under the fence
But he came and he went in such Christmas flash,
I wondered a second if he was Jumpin' Jack Flash
And then, in a twinkling, I saw him let go,
Of the load of firewood that his truck had in tow,
All over the driveway, it even crushed my old truck,
But I was so happy to have wood, I didn't give a f...(insert word of your choice)
No longer worried about freezing to death
I started prancing and dancing and pawing the ground,
Much to the amusement of the wife and everyone else around.
I waved to my new friend as he climbed in his rig
I wondered briefly what was his gig,
He was covered in sweat from his head to his boot,
And I chuckled thinking he was a smelly old coot.
His red coat was rotten, all tattered and torn,
And I realized at the time, he looked quite forlorn.
So I invited him in to the Silverhorn Christmas Table,
But I told him upfront, he must sleep in the stable
His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a berry,
It was then I knew he had drank all our sherry.
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a grin,
As I stood back from the door and invited him in.
He was a short little guy with a little fat belly,
That shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly!
A wink of his eye and a twist of his nose,
That was when I could see he was wearing panty hose.
He spoke not a word, but went right to the food.
If it wasn't for the firewood, I would think him quite rude.
And laying a finger aside of his nose,
He blew clear a nostril, all over his hose.
He sprang to his feet, and gave me a look,
Please pass along my compliments to the cook!
Well I must be going, there's so much to do,
However, I wonder, could you pack me a little of that stew?
With food in hand, and a thermos of hot tea,
He hugged the wife, and felt her up, as he shook hands with me.
The wife she giggled, and was acting quite frisky,
It was then I realized, she had drank all the whiskey.
Then out of the door he carried my wife off to his truck,
I thanked the good Lord for all my good luck.
And I heard him exclaim as he drove out of sight,
You can have her back sometime after midnight.
Merry Christmas to All, and to all a good night!

Animals In The News

Hey Silverhorner's !! Welcome to the Lodge. It 's been awhile since we had an "Animals In The News" stories so tonight let's catch up.....

Bears
Did you hear about the the Royal Canadian Mounted Police busting a grow-op apparently run by a family of black bears....

Yup, police in Christina Lake, British Columbia found some outdoor plots of marijuana being guarded by 10 large black bears. According to reports, the cops were a little cautious at first but the bears were actually pretty laid back, and didn't seem to have much issue with the police busting the illegal crop.

The theory is that the bears were there to guard the crops, but apparently they got a little....well....laid back about their guard duties and didn't seem to give a damn....one was overheard growling but he was just saying something about having the munchies.....

Cougars
A study of online dating by the University of Wales Institute, Cardiff, has blown the lid off the idea that older women, called "cougars" are looking for younger men! According to the study, the whole cougar idea may be limited to the world of female celebs, many of whom like to roll around in the hay with young, handsome, buff men. It seems in the world of dating, at least online dating, women are much more practical than one might believe....they are looking for wealthy men, regardless of age. Quite the opposite of men who spend most of their lives chasing or dreaming about chasing younger women....

Bulls
A friendly bull wanted to visit with the crowd at a 'recortadores' competition in Spain so he jumped into the stands....caused quite a bit of havoc too as about 40 folks got hurt in the rampage. Lucky for you, we got some video of this one!


Yup..........