Ah Halloween here at Silverhorn Mountain. I suppose it is Halloween where you are too...no post tonight folks...Marcello and I are going trick or treating....we'll be back tomorrow...unless of course we have another incident like last year....ummm...yeah...don't ask...suffice to say, if you are dressed up like a bank robber with a nylon stocking over your face, don't stop at the bank in the afternoon....
Hi Gang, Marcello here, tonight, the Boss is still on a drunken party/celebration following The View From Silverhorn Mountain getting 5/5 ladybugs on the famous blog review site, Frog My Blog. The last we heard of him he was in downtown Silverhorn handing out copies of the review....
So, in an effort to keep this little diatribe going, and to try and keep us a 5/5 rating, I figured I had better step in and cover for him. Besides it's friggin' cold outside and no one really even notices a garden gnome after the garden is frozen over...
Well...well...and well...it seems this little blog has a lot of influence....I don't want to make more of this than is necessary, and I don't want to take all the credit, but if you are a frequent reader of The View From Silverhorn Mountain, you will remember a little posting we did a short while ago entitled, "Anyone Seen The Ice Cap?"
Well it looks like British Prime Minister Tony Blair read this humble marvel of blogging and is singing out of our Silverhorn Songbook, coming out strong about climate change and the cost to the world if we don't do something about it...now.
I was wondering who the person from London was that keeps coming back to visit. I wonder if he has one of our Silverhorn t-shirts?
The good Prime Minister Tony has taken a clever stance, translating the loss of trees and ice etc into something that the movers and shakers of the world can understand, money...
The British PM said that the economic cost to fix the problem in the future will be Trillions of dollars...Trillions....now if that don't make you sit up and take notice nothing will...You got an extra trillion dollars that you can kick in to help out? I know you are wealthy, but just how wealthy? Mr. Blair has it right, do something now, or fix it later at great cost, either way it's gonna need fixin'...He is moving up the Silverhorn List of of Downright Notable People, right up there beside...well...hmmmm....well Maggie, our number one fan and triple gold platinum afterlife member.
It's interesting that Tony Blair is taking a strong lead on global warming, or the fight against it, while in Ottawa, the politicians are too busy to notice, still much too busy fighting over one of them calling his own ex-girlfriend a dog...Yup, these are our country's finest, and we're counting on them taking care of us and global warming....imagine the money we would have for the fight against global warming if we got rid of some of their salaries...perhaps not the trillions we need, but I suspect we can put a dent in it.
Kentucy Fried Chicken, hereafter known as KFC has decided to cut the transfat out of it's secret recipe...seems they want to get on the healthy bandwagon...I was wondering how they knew there were any transfats in their recipes,if the recipe is a secret...and how are we gonna know if they really do it....?
On another note, Binn (is it Bin or Binn? I can never remember)Laden and his minions have announced that they are pissed with Canada and we're now a target. Like we weren't before...He's also back on the Holy War tirade and talking about crusaders again...I think he reads too many medieval romance stories about the Holy Grail...maybe we should send him over a few buckets of the leftover KFC, the stuff with the transfat still in it....
Well, as much as I would like to keep writing, our Frog My Blog review did mention that we were a little long winded around here, and that is the last thing we want people to think, and we can take a little critique now and then, so we have pledged not to go on and on and on endlessly about stuff like we have done in so many of our previous View From Silverhorn Mountain posts here on Blogger, the best damm blog host in the entire blog business...
Nope, we had a little team meeting and decided to keep the View From Silverhorn short and sweet, get in, say what needs to be said and get out....not keep talking endlessly about the same old thing....
Hey Ho Silverhorners!! Welcome back to The View From Silverhorn Mountain. We've got some news! We've been reviewed by
Hey Gang! Welcome up to Silverhorn Mountain. Well, Marcello and the rest of the garden gnome boys have been at me lately to respond to some of the hundreds of letters, post cards and emails we have received here at the Lodge since we began posting.
Yes, we get letters (well actually no letters) and emails here all the time, many of them are not really for us, but we open them anyway....
So, after careful reflection, meaning I can't come up with a better idea after thinking about it for five or six seconds, I have decided to go for it.
So lets see what is in the old IN box.
The first one is from someone who's email is thewife@silverhornlodge.com who writes to say, "I'm leaving you, your clothes are all in the septic tank, and I have closed our bank account. You and your gnomes can go to Hell!!"
I wondered where my clothes were....
This one is from someone named Maggie, who sent us a short, but somewhat confusing email that merely says, "Where the Hell is my freakin'&*&$#& t-shirt that you promised to send me after I won your freakin'^&%$#$%contest???....and oh, by the way, Love your blog...is Marcello still single?"
Then we had one from Karl, at karl.crazymail.com who wrote to say, "I can't wait to win a t-shirt." The contest is over Karl...stop sending emails...I told you it's oooovvvvveeerrr!!
We recently received a nice email from Boothebear@nownutless.com wanted to thank us for all we had tried to do for him in his bid for freedom. Boo said that he didn't think he would be making any more escape attempts...there just didn't seem to be any hard reason to leave.... At least I think that is what he was trying to say, it was hard to read the email, it was covered in bear slobber.
We had several emails from someone at Reuters News, Yahoo, and Time Magazine, politely thanking us for reprinting their news articles and explaining the meaning of "plagerism" Wow! Who knew....??? I'd print their emails here, but....well...they appear a little touchy about that.
Digging a little deeper in the trash, oops!! I mean IN box, we had several emails from rocket scientists, that were not too complimentary about me or brain surgeons, but it all evened out because we had quite a few from brain surgeons who were not too complimentary about me or rocket scientists....they are full of big words, but I get the gist of it...I responded to both of them by saying that I heard the lawyers at Reuters, yahoo and Time Magazine think brain surgeons and rocket scientists are not all that bright....that will throw them off of me for a little while....
And yet another, this one from soontobeexife@havinganaffair.silverhorny.com who wrote a kind of cryptic message that our Silverhorn Lodge Cryptologists Team (SLCT)had trouble making sense of...however, they think it says, "Go Tuck Yourself" which doesn't mean much to us here, perhaps one of our readers might be able to shed a little light on it...
I can't tell you the numbers of not so nice emails we have received following our Crusty the Croc posts and other alligator stories. Most of them are difficult to read, they look like they were typed by people missing fingers and hands.....
Letourneau@inprisioncauseIsleptwithmystudentmail.com wrote a very suggestive letter to Marcello a couple of months back. Seems she is unhappy in her current relationship, indicating her husband has grown a little too tall, and wondering if Marcello might like to go out on a date.....
We had a rather official looking email from the Silverhorn Mountain Highway Patrol, (SMHP)who have politely asked me to roll up my window on the old Tracker if I am going to insist on speeding down the mountain singing "Born To Be Wild"....apparently I screwed up there radar gun...
Someone at CRAP, the Caper Regional Aeronautics Program, you remember them, they plan to build rockets in Cape Breton, Nova Scotia, dropped us a short note, simply saying "lay off"....I am not sure if that was a warning, or a notice that the CRAP was in the crapper and they were inviting me to the celebration....
Those of you who come here often are well aware the pure bliss that I get from making fun of people who wear the newest footwear rage, Alligators...er...no, Crocs...well...little did I know that any Croc wearers were intelligent enough to be able to read....I had several emails regarding crocs, the most memorable being one from sally@yesiamanidot.com who wrote to say that she wore them because she liked people to laugh at her behind her back...This substantiates my theory that the person who came up with the Crocs has a heck of a sense of humor....
There were several more pathetic attempts to convince me that these...um...shoes were the greatest thing since bottled water...I cannot print them all here, but I feel I should at least give a few of them honorable mention by posting their email address' and suggesting those of you who agree with me inundate them with smilely face icons...
So here goes:
Malcolm@Iliketowalklikeaduck.quackerspot.com
Sylvia@doyouthinkiamsexy.nope.com
Marcus@yesiamoutofthecloset.com
Peter@ineverwasinthecloset.com
Karl@ishouldbeputinthecloset.yup.com
Karen@iamtoooldforsexyshoes.patheticblog.com
Candy@willievergetlaidwearingcrocs.notlikely.com
Julia@iwishilivedinawindmill.com
Cindy@whyarepeoplelaughingatme.itsyourshoes.com
Wendy@theyaresocomfortable.nevergetlaid.com
Maggie@whereismy*&$#@$#t-shirt.com
Ok...I will let the Croc thing go...for tonight...
Anonymous@binnhidinginthemountains.pakistan.com wrote several weeks ago, saying something that we didn't understand at first, but has since been translated by the Silverhorn Lodge Received Foreign Email Translation Team (SLRFETT). The boys aren't positive of all the words, but loosely translated they say it says,
"Na-Na-Naaa-Na-Naaaa"
Finally, this just in today, we got one from theexwife@silverhornlodge.cum that says simply, "Ricardo is wonderful. Bye Sucker"
hmmm....perhaps I have been spending a little too much time at this blog.....
Todays Silverhorn Lodge Quote "Don't email us- we'll email you" - Marcello
Crocs
Garden Gnomes
Rocket Scientists
Hey Ho!! Silverhorners! Welcome back to The View From Silverhorn Mountain. We're still here, posting away as summer turns into autumn and autumn turns into leaves all over the ground...Looking around the Silverhorn Lodge lawns and gardens I realized we need a good windstorm to blow the leaves over to the neighbors....oops did I say that out loud..???
Well, the first Silverhorn Lodge great t-shirt give-a-way is over and our winner has put in her order and the shirt is being made as we speak from the finest silk we can get out of the lodge caterpillers...unfortunately, that may take some time....
So in the meantime, I think it is time we got back to business at hand, that is, back to our regular scheduled blogging and informing...it's been quite a while since you read our motto, "we do the research so you don't have to" so with that in mind, we have been busy.
Well, it seems there is a new book on the market, entitled, "The 101 Most Influential People Who Never Lived." Hmm....
At the head of the list is the Marlboro Man -- that manly mans man and womans dream cowboy who came to life in the 1950's advertising Marlboro cigarettes.
Numbers 2, 3 and 4 respectively are Big Brother, King Arthur, and Santa Claus...huh? I guess I have to stop right there....this book is obviously flawed...
To begin with, I don't exactly buy into the Marlboro Man being fiction, or having not lived...actually there were several Marlboro men, and they were quite alive when their picture was taken for the advertisements...Marlboro Man is not a person's name for heavens sake, it is a title, or a description. However, there was a man, so how can they say he never lived...in fact the original Marlboro Man died recently, I read it somewhere....I forget his name, sorry...
Secondly, those of us who subscribe to all kinds of conspiracy theories, know dam well there is a BIG BROTHER, it just happens that George Orwell was the first to uncover and write about it in his book 1984....hmmph...this book is starting to make me wonder if perhaps BIG BROTHER might be behind it...clever way to try to convince us he doesn't exist....
King Arthur not real? And therefor no Knights of the Roundtable? Tell that to Sir Lancelot and the other fellas running around the woods in big pieces of metal clothing and the horse they rode in on...(those horses must have been strong) I have it on good authority, that King Arthur was very likely a good little fellow by the name of Artius, and he was a King, and he was not unlike the King Arthur of the Holy Grail stories...No Holy Grail??? C'mon, if you think that way, move on, there is nothing for you to see here....
It seems the chaps who wrote this book, feel that Santa Claus comes in at number 4 on the list of influential people who never lived. OK...I have just about had it with these jokers...have they never read "Yes Virginia there is a Santa Claus"? Never seen the sleigh on Christmas Eve on the satellite tracking radar on the suppertime news??? Putting Santa Claus on this list is nothing short of criminal...I'm thinking it's time for a trip to Quantonamo Bay for these guys.
There's more of them, but I am not going to beat this to death..I never do that...although I do have to say that including the Loch Ness Monster in this list really gets under my skin. Yes, these brain sturgeons have made the pronouncement that Nessie isn't real. However, they did put her in a list of 'people' huh??? She's a lake monster you bozos....What I find most interesting about this, is their decision to include her as someone who never existed, like they know...@#$&*%$# (sorry about the language but this one gets me) How do they know Nessie isn't real..tell that to the people who have seen her and rode naked on her back...er...ummm...well.... I was drunk and it was dark.....but she said her name was Nessie, and she was a monster....
I am surprised that Marcello and Alonzo and Luigi and the other boys didn't make the list, especially Marcello...as Garden Gnomes go, that boy has been influential....But wait, they did say influential people who never existed, and we all know Marcello is real....
Todays Silverhorn Mountain Quote: "HO, HO, HO !!" - Santa Claus to this reporter, upon hearing that he had made a list of influential people who never existed.....
Holy Grail
Marlboro Man
Influential People
Hey Silverhorners! The results of the contest are in and the winner has been chosen by our panel of uncorruptible judges who didn't have to consult garden gnomes because they are garden gnomes!!
Any of you who have been following The View From Silverhorn Mountain know that we have been having a little contest. It wasn't difficult, you just had to find the email address on the blog, and write a short email explaining why you read The View From Silverhorn Mountain.
Our thanks to all the entrants, we had some very amusing entries, and it was very difficult to choose a winner....from the two entries....ok...one and a half entries....however, we sat down here at the Lodge and worked through it....and Folks we have a WINNER!!!
Now before we announce the aforementioned WINNER, I have to mention one of the other contestants, who may feel a little let down because he didn't win. Karl...I'm sorry, but we were looking for something a little more than "I can't wait to win my free tee shirt"Nice try.....you really went overboard with content...and style....
Well the entries have been entered, and the judging has been judged and the selections have been selected and the moment has come, the winner of the Silverhorn Lodge Contest is.....we'll tell ya right after the commercial break....oh wait, we don't have any sponsers....so let's get on with it!! The winner is......Maggie!!! Our Silverhorn Lodge triple gold platinum member, who wrote the following:
"I gotta tell ya ... there are alot of posts in the Silverhorn Lodge Blog that make me laugh. Not just laugh but great big belly laughs. It starts my day at work in fine style. Just before all the bosses arrive at work, I have my morning coffee, in my new, high-end, Silverhorn Coffee Mug, reading the latest and greatest at Silverhorn Lodge. Yes, it's the thing a Civil Servant should do. It's moves us away from the old adage that all Civil Servants do during their workday is read the paper. Reading Silverhorn's Blog makes you look incredibly busy and it keeps one "up" on world news especially any "Am I Stupid" news of the world and there seems to be plenty of that going around.
I think my favourite posting, so far, was Tuesday, May 16th "The DaVinci Code - A Garden Gnomes Perspective". Very thought provoking - Marcello asked some very good questions. Proves he's just not a cement stud but a cement stud with a brain. You know, I might suggest that the next time the "powers-that-be" decide to reorganize the Department, they should procure Marcello as their Consultant. Imagine the outcome ....."
Cheers!
Maggie
Well well Maggie...you did it!! I think that whole bit about Marcello being a cement stud might have put your entry over the top. I know he voted twice for you. Your tee shirt is on the way, we just gotta save enough money to buy it, and get it shipped...please allow 3 - 48 weeks for delivery!!
Hey You! Welcome to The View From Silverhorn Mountain.
Tonight's post is going to be a little bit of a departure from the usual issues we report on, and give you all a much needed change of pace....why you ask? why mess with success? Well...I think you have been having too much fun....
Don't worry, we will get back to our regularly scheduled foolishness tomorrow.
So without further aaaadoooo we bring you this premiere Silverhorn Mountain Special Feature Presentation.
The Ice Cap Emergency
Here on Silverhorn Mountain, an Ice Cap is a cold drink you buy at Tim Hortons, otherwise known as an Ice Cappacino and they are I might add, pretty damm tasty. In fact, I have become hooked on the things... If you have had one, you know what I mean. You also know the disappointment that comes when the glass is empty and you are left trying to suck the shreds of foam from the bottom, resulting in a somewhat attention gathering slurrpppettthchchch noise.
Well, if like me you feel a sense of loss when the cup is empty, imagine how we are all going to feel if the environmentalists are right, and I have no reason to think they are not. It appears that Africa's two highest mountains — Mount Kilimanjaro and Mount Kenya (both of which pale in comparison to Silverhorn Mountain) are going to lose their ice cover within 25 to 50 years if deforestation and industrial pollution are not halted and halted soon.
Reports indicate that Kilimanjaro has already lost 82 percent of its ice cover over the last 80 years and Mount Kenya, one of the few places near the equator with permanent glaciers, has lost 92 percent over the past 100 years.
So what does this mean to us? Is it more land for the Africans to perhaps build some condos on? Well maybe, but the reality is the loss of the ice cap is like turning off the water tap. That is where most of the water in the rivers and streams and lakes comes from. As it melts and runs off, it won't be back, at least not anytime soon, if ever.
Enviromentalists claim that this is a reflection of the climate change that is well underway and at the moment Africa is the most vulnerable. This isn't just a problem for Africa, this is a problem for everyone. At best this is the equivalent to another canary falling dead in the coal mine. Global warming is out there folks and it's coming to a climate theatre near you.
One of the problems is that industrialized nations are causing much of the pollution having a negative impact on the earth's temperature and in turn, poor nations are forced to cut down more and more forests for fuel. However, the same industrialzed nations are not doing all they can to help out in places like Africa and other enviromental hotspots around the world.
The loss of the African forests, like the rainforests, are removing nature's way of managing water, and temperature and oxygen. If we continue to cut down every tree standing, we're all gonna bake.
Experts on the scene have said that the two great mountains will have lost all their ice in the next 25 to 50 years if we don't bring the deforestation and pollution issues under control.
It's not all doom and gloom though, the Green Belt Movement, in collaboration with the French Agency for Development, have plans to launch a $2 million project that will see 2 million trees planted over the next 30 years, spread over 4,942 acres within the areas of Mount Kenya and the Kenyan range of mountains called the Aberdares.
Both are important water catchment areas in Kenya, with many rivers originating from them and these rivers are major sources of water and power generated by dams.
The Green Belt Movement expects the trees will absorb about 800,000 tons of carbon dioxide before 2017.
Here around Silverhorn Mountain, things don't look that much better. Every year our rivers and streams dry to mere trickles by mid summer, water levels in our lakes fall far below the norm and stay there until the fall, some never coming back to what they used to be. One river, I know very well, goes from a raging torrent in the spring, to a mere babbling brook by mid July, just in time for Atlantic Salmon who entered the river in the torrent of early summer, to find themselves dying in no water halfway to their spawing grounds.
Acid Rain has taken it's toll in Nova Scotia, and in particular the rivers along the eastern coast of the province, but acid rain is not the only cuplrit and cannot be held entirely reponsible for the loss of the salmon, regardless of what you have heard from the biologists and the 'experts' When you can walk across a river and not get your feet wet, well, you are either have some Messianic ability, or there is no water in the river...I dunno about you, but it's been my experience that fish need water...no water, no fish....duh...and I don't have a biology degree either....
Flying over that river and what used to be called a watershed system, quickly points to the lack of a tree for miles and miles as forestry operations have cut down every piece of wood as far as the eye can see, leaving nothing but the slashings of dry branches and the ruts form the enormous tire of tree farmer and skidder equipment.
I remember when this river and many like them supported an ample stock of salmon and trout and August fishing was often very good. Now, the fishing has all but ended and the fish disappeared. How much longer before the river itself disappears and so much more with it.
We have to realize that a tree can come down in a few minutes, but to do any good, it has to grow for decades. Reforestation is great, and should be done, but so should cutting be controlled in the first place.
For example, in Nova Scotia, with the exception of a couple of small sites of what is known as Old Growth Forest, meaning an area of forest that has never seen a buck saw or a chain saw or a tree harvester, there are no forests that haven't been cut over, at least once. The problem is worsened by past logging practices, called high grading which removed most of the best trees leaving the scrubs and poor trees to reproduce and reforest. That is one of the reasons why so many of our forests are trees of little commercial value except as a source of pulp.
We are now putting in place some laws to protect the old growth forest places, but it is not enough. We need to protect other areas as well, and give them a chance to become the Old Growth Forests of the future. We need to stop cutting down every tree and we definitely need to keep forest operations kilometers, not mere metres from the waters edge. We need to plant trees, lots of trees, and not just outside the urban areas, we need trees and forests in our cities and towns and in our backyards. Do you really need that big lawn to mow? Do you have room for a few trees? Why not plant a tree or two in your back yard, more trees, you'll have shade, and a windbreak in winter, protection for the small animals and birds, as well as increasing the oxygen levels and fighting pollution, and as a bonus, less lawn to cut...works for me.
No more Ice Caps no more water...no more water...no more Ice Caps...can you live without one.....?
Your thoughts???
Ice Cap
Acid Rain
Global Warming
Trees
Hey Silverhorners!! Welcome back to the View From Silverhorn Mountain! How nice of you to drop in for a visit with us here at the Lodge.
First of all and before I go off on a tangent about something else and forget, knowing as I know you do, how I tend to stray off topic on my little rants and tangents, and how sometimes it takes me so long to get back to what I started to say that I forget what it was and usually go off on something else, like the weather or some odd news or the antics of Marcello and the boys, or the phase of the moon, or some story of a wayward bear or alligator... well... I am not going to do that tonight....oops....oh well...what I started to say was...ummm....oh yeah, The View From Silverhorn Lodge is now NUMBER 1, that's #1, No.1, Number One, Numero Uno and all that on Bloggrrr.
Hey Silverhorners! Welcome back to the View From Silverhorn Mountain! We're glad to have ya! Happy Thanksgiving if you are in Canada tonight.
We had a big turkey supper here tonight....no we didn't cook a turkey, we invited all the family over, these are the people my wife refers to as a bunch of 'turkeys' over and fed them baked beans and rolls. It's somewhat of a tradition here at the Lodge. We try to look after the turkeys...
It was a beautiful day here on the mountain, so warm it was easy to forget it is already October and the winter is not far away. I got a lot of yard work done, including spreading some lawn seed and watering it. I have high hopes that global warming is going to kick in and here in the north we will experience some year round summer...it's great to be optimistic.....
Frequent visitors will recognize that we have a new sponsor now, having changed our marketing provider, we're trying out some new stuff from a new company, they have nice little ads with nice little pictures.
Sounds like the Cape Bretoners are well on the way to getting drunk...er I mean involved in the space program. The televison news just reported a Cape Breton man saw a UFO last night...
Marcello and the rest of the Silverhorn Lodge Research Team are reporting that Reuters News is reporting a lawyer in Berlin, has hung up a shingle offering his services to those unfortunate souls out there who have been kidnapped by aliens. Yup, if you have been kidnapped by aliens, Jens Lorek is gonna get you compensated for your trouble...it's unclear if he expects the government or the aliens to pay....
"There's quite obviously demand for legal advice here," Jens Lorek told Reuters by telephone on Thursday. He has yet to win an alien abduction case in court. He says there are plenty of potential clients, noting that extra-terrestrial watchdogs report scores of alien assaults every year.
"The trouble is, people are afraid of making fools of themselves in court."
Uh-huh...people are afraid of making fools of themselves...obviously Lorek doesn't have that problem.....I wonder if he could represent me.....
Here is something I find interesting...the world is full of news...there are wars going on, people dying, medical breakthroughs, North Korea and it's nuclear missile business...but when you read the news websites...they are reporting as one of their Top Stories that Angolina Jolie and Brad Pitt took a rickshaw ride in India....imagine..they did what??? a rickshaw ride...in India....wow...what next???
An insurance company in London, apparently called "Sky Living For More Than"??? .....???......????????.....those British.....anyway, they hired a company to do some research, (obviously they didn't contact our trusty bunch of researchers) to find out what drivers are thinking about...and guess what they found out....1.2 million drivers are thinking about sex....uh-huh...but then, we knew that already didn't we...I mean...you're thinking about it now....
Yup, this is research similiar to the kind we do here at the Lodge. The interviewed 4497 adults and found out 1.2 million of them were thinking about sex....huh? I guess the discrepancy can be accounted for when you realize that the researchers were thinking about sex.....
Finally from the "Am I Stupid Files", which by the way we are going to change to read the "I Am Stupid Files". It seems a young fellow was arrested in Houston for carrying a stick of dynamite, a fuse and a blasting cap on an airplane flight from Argentina, South America to the United States....yup...stupid....he told the 'officials' that it was a souvenir....amazingly they didn't believe him...
I don't make this stuff up folks...
Well, I gotta get going...I am feeling kinda...well...lets just say I feel like going driving.....
Hi Silverhorners! Welcome to Silverhorn Lodge, situated on the side of majestic Silverhorn Mountain, overlooking shimmering Silverhorn Lake and just a stones throw from the Silverhorn Lodge outhouse.
Marcello here, Chief Silverhorn Lodge Garden Gnome and Executive Vice President of Marketing for the fabulous Silverhorn Lodge line of exciting clothing and apparel. It's Saturday and the Boss is having a little nap. He's pretty tired out from his week of escapades in the Silverhorn Lodge Chevy Tracker earlier this week, and he was pretty busy today getting the Lodge grounds in order before the first snows hit the mountain. The Boss is funny like that, he like to know that even under 2 feet of snow his grass looks good....he has issues folks...but then, if you read this blog at all, you know that already.
I thought this might be a great opportunity for me to draw your attention to some of the terrific clothing designs we have available. These shirts and hats give you a chance to show off your affiliation with Silverhorn Lodge and look 'marvelous darling' at the same time.
So, welcome to the first Silverhorn Lodge Fashion Show, and be the first on your block to own some of this fantastic outerwear.
The first item on our list is the Womans Cap Tee, with a fabulous picture of yours truly, Marcello, on the front. Girls in this shirt, you will be the centre of attention every time you walk into a room.
For those cool fall evenings by the campfire, you can stay warm while looking great in the Silverhorn Lodge Raglan Pink Hoodie. This looks terrific with a pair of jeans.
What outdoors guy goes out these days without a cap, and how tiresome it becomes to see everyone walking around with a NIKE logo on their hat. They all look the same. Well, not anymore, not since we put together the Silverhorn Lodge Logo and this stylin' cap. Available in beige or white. Look cool and keep the sun out of your eyes at the same time.
Ringer tees are what those in the biz call this next one, and they are becoming a staple of every girls wardrobe. Show off your individuality while looking fine in this Silverhorn Lodge Green Ringer.
This is the Silverhorn Lodge Hooded Sweatshirt. Perfect for boat rides or sitting around the campfire playing guitar. Not bad for robbing convenience stores either, although we don't recommend that activity....
Ahh...I always love these, especially because it has my picture on it. This is the equivalent of the 'little black dress' that all women have to have. This is the Marcello White Tee Shirt.
This is the Silverhorn Lodge staff shirt. Each spring, before the Lodge opens for the summer season, the Boss buys us all a new Silverhorn white shirt, and we all line up in front of the main lodge building for a group photo. This is casual enough to wear to a barn dance, and formal enough for casual Fridays at work, of course it is also required wearing on the Silverhorn Lodge mini golf course.
Finally, this one is for the ladies...*wink* the Boss would kill me if he knew I was putting this on here, but c'mon, it's my picture...and I am in charge of marketing...here it is, the Marcello Thong, what every woman wants in her pants...me...Marcello!! I'm a good fit, and comfortable to have close by....
These are just a sampling of the great designs and Silverhorn Lodge items that we have available. We have recently partnered with a little company located just down the other side of the mountain, called Cross The Line Designs and they have graciously agreed to manage the sale and distribution of our products. I encourage you to
Hey Ho Silverhorners!! Welcome to The View From Silverhorn Mountain! Let me tell ya, the view from the Silverhorn is spectacular tonight. According to Marcello, our Chief Garden Gnome and top researcher for the Silverhorn Lodge Institute of Research And Development Team (SLIORADT) the moon is full and it's 12% bigger than other full moons this year...and I am not talking about old Shelly MacDougal down in Silverhorn Valley, yes it's true that Shelley has gained weight, and yes it's true that she does like to have a drink or two on Friday nights and then stand outside the Town Hall and moon the village council members...and yes ok...I agree, she does seem to have gained a little weight, but I don't think her ass is a full 12% bigger than last year....but I haven't done any measurements...
Nope, I am talking about the MOON the real moon, which is full tonight. (You'd know that if you ever bothered to scroll down the sidebar of this post and see the Phases of the Moon picture that is updated at great expense and bother every frigging day...but I digress...geez I might be a little cranky tonight..probably too much blog and not enough grog...
OK, back to the Moon. It's full. Bigger than usual...nuff said?
I think not, especially given our motto, you know it by now surely to God...oh alright for the nubies, let's say it together, the Silverhorn Lodge Motto is "we do the research so you don't have to" There, got it, there will be a test...
So you ask...Why Bob is the moon so big tonight. Well, I'm glad you asked, my researchers tell me it is near Perigee, which I believe is a little town just outside of Bangor, Maine, but I'm not sure...perigee might also be the point on its slightly out-of-round orbit that is closest to Earth...where do we get this stuff???
Now to a lot of the unwashed, this Moon is called the Harvest Moon, because it comes along in the fall and lets farmers work all night in the fields picking there genetically altered produce (oops that slipped out) and marijuana...
Here at the Silverhorn we learn something new everyday. I always thought that it was called the Harpest Moon because of the old standard song, "Shine on Harpest Moon" but I have since been corrected. Marcello tells me that song is actually called "Put a Shine on the Sharpest Spoon" Of course it is, that makes much more sense...
In case you care, the Moon will rise around 6 p.m. local time, however given that membership in the Silverhorn Lodge is global you will have to figure out exactly when that is depending on exactly where you are when the moon comes up....glad to help....
I'm told it will be officially "full" at 11:13 p.m. ETT, (Extra Terrestial Time) though the Moon is never really full....what???? what??? What does that mean? It will never be really full...well why are we calling it the "full moon"?
Well get this, according to Space.com "The disk of the Moon can appear 100 percent sunlit from Earth only if it is diametrically opposite to the Sun in the sky. But at that moment the Moon would be positioned in the middle of Earths shadow -- and in total eclipse. So in any month when there is no eclipse, there is an ever-so-slight sliver of darkness somewhere on the lunar limb throughout those hours -- or that moment -- when the Moon is passing through "full" phase."
Huh uh...
Well, ya live and learn eh? Especially when you are here at Silverhorn Lodge....we should be allowed to grant degrees....
So, in summation and closing my dear friend, (I read that somewhere) here are some Strange Moon Facts you can use to wow your coworkers and impress your boss...pay attention because you might be on Jeopardy some day....
The Moon is not bigger when on the horizon. Well it is, but because the horizon keeps moving, no one has ever been able to get right up and measure it....
The moon does not get bigger when you look through binoculars or a telescope...the binoculars just make it look closer...
The moon is made of mozzarella cheese. That's where they get 'shaker' cheese for spaghetti...but you knew that..the clue is on the container...Kraft....Space Kraft....duh...
The moon in Kentucky is blue...and it keeps on shining....
Dogs howl at the moon...ya...nope...they are howling because their owner left them out all night and they are frigging cold...
You can see the face of the man on the moon if you look closely. The same scientists that made Mona Lisa talk are now working on him....
A couple of months ago a bunch of Cape Bretoners in Nova Scotia thought they were gonna all get jobs building rockets to take people to the moon....that proved a little out of reach so they went back to making moonshine instead....you can buy a
Hey! Welcome to The View From Silverhorn Mountain. I'm your host for this evening, Marcello. Yes, it's true, I am a garden gnome...actually Chief Garden Gnome here at Silverhorn Lodge, wanna make something of it?
Yes, frequent subsribers to this collection of nonsense know that the Boss spent the weekend repairing his 4X4 and went bombing down the mountain in the Tracker singing Born To Be Wild at the top of his lungs...and yes, except for a garbled message from his cell phone late yesterday, hasn't been heard from since....we are going to call in some help....later...as the Boss was always so fond of saying, First and foremost Marcello... The View From Silverhorn Mountain must go on....he calls it his "legacy" Who am I to argue....
Shortly after the garbled phone message, Mrs Boss grabbed her vast assortment of Bingo daubers, screamed "Geronimo" and raced off down the mountain in her Geo Metro...we haven't heard from her since, but the radio announced a 48 hour Bingo Mania Marathon at the Silverhorn-Bingo-Billiards-Bowling Centre, which local residents know is actually the church hall....
So here we go, I asked our team of researchers to pull something together for me, but with the Boss away, and Mrs Boss apparently on a little Bingo Party of her own, I feel some responsibility to pull this thing together, so I have some short snappers for ya...
From the "Am I Stupid" files,Bradley Robison, 18, of Cedar Rapids, was charged with possession of marijuana with intent to deliver and failure to affix a drug tax stamp.
This genius tried to convince the police who busted him that he was innocent, because the marijuana wasn't really his, he said he had stolen it from a nearby business that he had just broken into....
A Pennsyvania man accused of theft arrived for a preliminary hearing wearing a cardboard box on his head in an effort to conceal his identity. I don't know if the Judge saw the humor in it or not, but charges were dropped at the hearing when the defendent reached an agreement to pay for the item he had allegedly stolen, valued at less than $600. Unlike other more creative crooks, this guy was trying to think 'inside the box.'
OK, somewhere in Ireland, there is one horny fellow....well, I suppose that could be true of anywhere, not just Ireland, however, in this case, an Irish guy won the 2006 World Oyster Eating Championship. The now sexed up winner, Michael Moran put away 30 of the little aphrodisiacs in 2 minutes and 35 seconds, 5 seconds ahead of his closest competitor.
The secret, he said, was a steady hand with the oyster knife.
"It has to be a smooth movement or you risk crunching the shell and then you get points taken off for grit," he said.
uh-huh...I knew that...it's always the grit that gits ya.
When asked for a quote after the contest, the winner asked the attractive female reporter if she was interested in going back to his place to look at his trophy....
A New Hampshire woman has been charged with going after her husband with an axe. The husband reported that during a heated argument Sunday evening, Linda Masse, 50, chased him through their house with an axe, swung it at him and missed, shattering a glass door. According to our sources, (and you know Silverhorn Lodge sources) in a statement to police, the axe swinger said she was sorry she broke the glass door...
"Life is too important to be taken seriously." - Oscar Wilde
