Hey Silverhorners! Welcome.
Tonight was Improv night here on Silverhorn Mountain, as three of the regional high school improv teams battled it out in a gruelling contrest om improvisation, acting and dramatics. My team, the team I was rooting for, gave a great showing and came in third!! Not bad for a relatively new team, mostly made up of first year improv students including my daughter. Someday she is gonna be a star, and I will be able to give up running this lodge and live the life of decadent luxury I was supposed to live. My oldest daughter who was with me in the audience, had to hold me back as I tried several times to take part. She said she has heard of soccer moms, but never an improv Dad.....
Tonight is a long one, but a must read if you are a conspiracy theorist, or bored....as promised, we have scooped the scoop on the report of the investigation into the death of Diana, Princess of Wales, mother of the heir to the Throne of England.
Princess Diana - The Conspiracy ContinuesAs promised, our team of Silverhorn Researchers and investigative reporters have been hard on the Diana, Princess Of Wales Conspiracy case, digging up the facts. The findings of the latest investigation into her death are due to be made public this week, but because we are crackerjack investigative reporters, we have most of the contents of the report now...it also helps to have an internet connection...
Here is what we have come up with so far.
1) The US Secret Service was bugging the Princess's telephone. Yup, listening in on all those royal conversations, right up until the night she was killed...The United States admits doing this, but says the tapes don't give any information that might shed light on the investigation...uh-huh..doesn't the fact that they were bugging her phone shed some light on the investigation?
2)A British Member of Pariament asks if it was the Americans who had decided to listen to Diana's phone calls for their own purposes, or if they were doing so on behalf of the British, who are far too polite to bug someone's telephone.
3) The soon to be released report which I am told is 400 pages long, mentions no proof that the fatal car crash was planned by MI6 on the orders of the Duke of Edinburgh. A source close to the report says there is a possiblity it does contain some pictures of Britney Spears without panties, but that is unconfirmed at this time. If there are no pics of Britney, it will be the only publication without them...
4) The father of Dodi Al-Fayed, hereinafter known as Mr. Fayed, the owner of a very fashionable store in London, Harrods, said he intends to step up his campaign to prove that MI6 were behind the crash. He is going to launch an attack on the BBC...I'm not sure what this will do for him, but the BBC are always easy to make fun of, so I wish him good luck with it.
5) Of course, senior 'officials' in the police say that Mr Fayed probably shouldn't question the report, because of the excellent reputation of the leader of the investigation, a guy from London called Lord Stevens. It seems the Lord has already bashed the intelligence services, Army, police and politicians during his inquiry into collusion between the Royal Ulster Constabulary and loyalist paramilitary groups in Northern Ireland. Therefor, it seems likely that he would have no reason not to bash anyone involved in this little coverup...if there was a coverup...not that there is any coverup...
6) It seems the key determination that Lord Stevens is hanging his white wig and deerstalker hat on, is that Henri Paul, the alleged driver of the alleged car was allegedly over the legal alcohol limit. According to the reports, the guy was wasted.
Uh-huh, we knew that. I hope the government didn't pay a lot of money to Lord Stevens to have him come up with that answer...The report is going to say that Henri Paul's intoxication was a major contributing factor in his losing control of the Mercedes after it became involved in a high-speed race with paparazzi the night of the accident. OK. He was drunk. We knew that. But what made him drunk...was he drugged? Was he given more liqour at the scene, how did he get drunk? Those are the questions, we want answered.
7) In addition to the above, authorities admit to errors in the handling of samples taken from Mr Paul on the night of the crash. C'mon, the evidence was tainted??? Is that what they are saying? Tainted evidence ain't evidence, anyone who watches CSI knows that....DNA evidence apparently proves that the samples came from Henri, but when, and under what circumstances were they obtained. Mr Fayed, who seems to have an inside track here claims that the samples the authorities tested were not the same samples used to test the DNA. Well well...if this is true, then they don't count at all. We gotta get Gil Grisham and his team on this one.
8) Lord Stevens report will say that Diana was not pregnant, basing his findings on the results of tests carried out 10 days before her death as part of a treatment for pre-menstrual tension. Oh yeah. How do we know the reports are real, that sounds a little flimsy to me. Like using one of those test strips...you might be pregant but you better check with your doctor.
9)The good Lord Stevens also says that there is no evidence that Diana and Dodi were planning to get married, however, as reported here in The View From Silverhorn Mountain last night, a french jeweller has indicated they just purchased an engagement ring. Perhaps Lord Stevens missed that one.
10) Here is where it gets juicier. It seems the report will likely concede that employees of the Ritz Hotel in Paris, where Diana and Dodi were staying had been snitching to French intelligence services, giving them the lowdown on the downlow going on in between D & D as we like to call them. But, of course, the claims of MI5 or MI6 being involved have been discounted. What about MI1, MI2, MI3 and MI4 when all this was going on, why aren't we hearing anything about them??? Suspicious.
I bet you didn't even know about the first four MI's did ya? Ha! you gotta read The View From Silverhorn Mountain more often.
11) The Queen recently celebrated her 80th birthday in the Ritz Hotel in London...hmmmm....does anyone else find it strange that the Queen with access to castles and palaces all over the British Empire has to book the family party room at a downtown hotel to have her birthday?
12)Her Royal Highness, known hereinafter as the Queen, or "Queenie" to her friends, has instructed 'officials' not to respond to any claims made by Mr Fayed. This will be difficult because we all know how 'officials' like to make comments. The Royal Family plans to put forward a united front in the immediate aftermath of the Lord Steven's report due later this week knowing that the report will work up the crazy conspiracy theorists and bloggers all over the world...yeah right, like us bloggers have nothing better to write about than this stuff...are the Buckingham family forgetting we still have Britney Spears?
13) The report is going to say that the only credible explanation was the driver of the vehicle carrying the couple, Henri Paul the drunken doped up driver, lost control of his car after it hit the 13th pillar of the underpass. I say again, hu-huh..we know that...geez...he lost control of the car, the crash killed them. we know that. What we don't know is why the crash happened, other than the claim the driver was drunk.
14) Mr Fayed, through a spokesperson, has questioned the claims in the report that Henri was driving at 100 mph. "This is utterly and provably untrue. Scotland Yard has acknowledged that it was travelling at about 60mph," he said.
15) The report also claims that they interviewed hundreds of witnesses, which is questionable, given that claim from Mr Fayed that none of the 13 eyewitnesses at the scene have been seen or interviewed as part of the investigation. 13? Did he say 13? But they interviewed hundreds...where did they find hundreds?
16) In addition, no one has been able to trace the two missing cars and at least one motorbike which went into the tunnel at the same time as Henri Paul and his passengers. I remember this from the original television coverage, witnesses then spoke of seeing a motorcycle and a couple of other vehicles.
In summation, your honor, ladies and gentlemen of the jury...oops...I drifted off to thinking I was a lawyer for moment there....I cannot put much stock in this report which has apparently cost millions of dollars. Millions of dollars to essentially say the driver was drunk...meanwhile, the unanswered questions pile up, and those of us who are wondering about this are discounted as conspiracy theorists, which is a quick out for anyone trying to avoid answering questions they are trying to avoid...if you get my meaning.
Fear not, I have assigned a couple of the researchers to remain abroad and continue this investigation on our behalf, because here at the Silverhorn, "we do the research so you don't have to"
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